tearjerker
My head is spinning. I want to run. To breathe fresh air. To feel that I'm alive.
As so many times before, I am thinking about how much I need a spiritual journey. Call it whatever. A walkabout, perhaps. I need to get out of campus. Away from civilization. Leave Sweden, Europe and everything that I am used to. I want to learn new languages, learn new cultures and become more aware. Every now and then I ask myself the question 'what the hell am I doing right now?' and it is indeed a justified question.
When will I be able to take off to Tibet, India and Argentina? Volunteer in Bangladesh, and have a stormy affair in Italy? I can't help but smile because I know it will happen, one way or another. Although procrastination is one of my specialties, whenever I actually do set my mind to something I make it happen with great élan.
I want to get a backpack, go to the most deserted place in the world and find myself there. I want to bring all my clothes and give them away, work without anything in return. I want to learn true compassion and how to practice it. I want to meditate on top of a mountain, watch a sunset in every continent, dip my toe into every ocean and bake cookies to homeless children.
My head is spinning. I have so many plans, so many wishes.
Update
I've been terribly bad at keeping my blog going. Not that I have a thousand interesting things to write about, nor do I have heaps of followers, but just for fun I'm keeping this thing going.
First of all, my trip around the US this summer was just amazing! Seeing NYC, Chicago, Milwaukee, Minneapolis, and San Fran was a dream! No to mention all the reunions with Nick, Emma, Angel, Gretchen, Chris, Andy, Nichole, Alex, and Charlie. How insane is that? And it all happened in three weeks. Can you even imagine how exhausted I was by the end of it all?
After returning to Sweden, I started uni in a matter of days and I must say that I really love what I am studying. The second year of my program focuses on peace and development, which is the best part of it all. Looking forward to lectures, and finding new areas of interests for every day that passes by is.... I can't even describe it,. wonderful!
Elsewise, this year I'm celebrating new years eve in no place less than Park City close to Salt Lake City, Utah. So yes, two rounds to the United Stated within six months, I am one lucky gal! I'll be seeing Chris again, and I'll learn how to ski, I guess it'll be interesting and a bit embarrassing being a Swede not knowing how to ski. I might have to make them all believe that I have a polar bear as a pet to defend my "swedeness", or what do you think?
Needless to say, I miss traveling already and I cannot wait until I'm on that plane, knowing that I'm going to a new and exciting place to explore. Sweden is amazing, I guess it's just not my cup of tea, so to say.
And more? There's not much left to say about me. My life is pretty ordinary filled with studies, work every now and then and as many trips as I can possibly go on. My flatmate and I decided to get a third, so now we're three people living here which is nice! But life goes on in the same directions as before, I am single, uncertain of what will become of me, and schizophrenic when it comes to my taste in music.
However, I have spent more time thinking about what I want to do with my life, and even though it is all a huge blur I'm pretty certain I want to spend my life doing field work, the actual practical work in order to change societies to the better. Salary has always been a factor of importance to me, as I am taking loans for my studies. But in time, money becomes less and less important. I fully understand the value of money, however I don't count money in terms of power or fancy clothes, but in plane tickets and good food, and I guess that's what's been influencing my certainty of doing field work in the future. And I'm happy about it, because how could it not be more important to contribute to the world's development and it's inhabitant's improved living situations, than having a six figure amount on your bank account? It simply doesn't add up to me.
But of course that does not make me a non-materialistic person, I'm still a so-called "brand-whore" regarding certain things, and as so many people I too thrive for some things in my life to be of a higher value, e.g. my laptop.
Oh well, I just cleansed my mind a bit there. I'm going to continue my studies now. It's very interesting, but there's so much to read and understand.
Cheerio
First of all, my trip around the US this summer was just amazing! Seeing NYC, Chicago, Milwaukee, Minneapolis, and San Fran was a dream! No to mention all the reunions with Nick, Emma, Angel, Gretchen, Chris, Andy, Nichole, Alex, and Charlie. How insane is that? And it all happened in three weeks. Can you even imagine how exhausted I was by the end of it all?
After returning to Sweden, I started uni in a matter of days and I must say that I really love what I am studying. The second year of my program focuses on peace and development, which is the best part of it all. Looking forward to lectures, and finding new areas of interests for every day that passes by is.... I can't even describe it,. wonderful!
Elsewise, this year I'm celebrating new years eve in no place less than Park City close to Salt Lake City, Utah. So yes, two rounds to the United Stated within six months, I am one lucky gal! I'll be seeing Chris again, and I'll learn how to ski, I guess it'll be interesting and a bit embarrassing being a Swede not knowing how to ski. I might have to make them all believe that I have a polar bear as a pet to defend my "swedeness", or what do you think?
Needless to say, I miss traveling already and I cannot wait until I'm on that plane, knowing that I'm going to a new and exciting place to explore. Sweden is amazing, I guess it's just not my cup of tea, so to say.
And more? There's not much left to say about me. My life is pretty ordinary filled with studies, work every now and then and as many trips as I can possibly go on. My flatmate and I decided to get a third, so now we're three people living here which is nice! But life goes on in the same directions as before, I am single, uncertain of what will become of me, and schizophrenic when it comes to my taste in music.
However, I have spent more time thinking about what I want to do with my life, and even though it is all a huge blur I'm pretty certain I want to spend my life doing field work, the actual practical work in order to change societies to the better. Salary has always been a factor of importance to me, as I am taking loans for my studies. But in time, money becomes less and less important. I fully understand the value of money, however I don't count money in terms of power or fancy clothes, but in plane tickets and good food, and I guess that's what's been influencing my certainty of doing field work in the future. And I'm happy about it, because how could it not be more important to contribute to the world's development and it's inhabitant's improved living situations, than having a six figure amount on your bank account? It simply doesn't add up to me.
But of course that does not make me a non-materialistic person, I'm still a so-called "brand-whore" regarding certain things, and as so many people I too thrive for some things in my life to be of a higher value, e.g. my laptop.
Oh well, I just cleansed my mind a bit there. I'm going to continue my studies now. It's very interesting, but there's so much to read and understand.
Cheerio
