"You're off the hook"
Hey, I'm back from work. I made it!
I'm tired but I don't feel like sleeping, so I'll just chill out, watch a movie or something and wait for sleep to hit me.
Anywho, I've been thinking. My sister is on her way here right this moment, her plane from Sweden took off about five hours ago, and in a few days she'll be here with me. So will my friend from high school. I can only say that I am very happy. Very, very happy!
Well. Moving down here has been confusing for me in mustiple aspects. I have realized things I never thought I would. I have missed people as much as I have almost forgotten people that I never thought I would miss/forget. Well, I have always had a strong philosophy about missing someone, and it has kept me from doing just that in many situations and with many people, but this philosophy seems to have disappeared somewhere along the way which I actually don't like at all. I don't like being that dependent, when I know that I can take care of myself. I should be fully able to just "erase" someone from my mind just by wanting it, as I could do before. So, once and for all, I will try to make this happen. Once and for all is all I'm asking for. Just let me forget, because I don't want to think nor miss anymore.
Of course, this does not concern everyone. I don't mind missing family, good friends or my NZ whanau, because all of you are close to my heart and will always be, and missing you only brings me to good memories and a smile on my face. Even though I can't see you right now, I'm still grateful for every second with you. I don't mind missing you just because of that, because you make me smile.
HOWEVER
By the time my smile fades away because I miss someone, that's when my mind needs to be cleared. So, why isn't it working as it should?
Just some 7 am thoughts. I'm tired and still a bit "high" on coffee and JD & coke. Excuses for any confusions. I'm just done with this now. Time for mind dicipline.
I'm tired but I don't feel like sleeping, so I'll just chill out, watch a movie or something and wait for sleep to hit me.
Anywho, I've been thinking. My sister is on her way here right this moment, her plane from Sweden took off about five hours ago, and in a few days she'll be here with me. So will my friend from high school. I can only say that I am very happy. Very, very happy!
Well. Moving down here has been confusing for me in mustiple aspects. I have realized things I never thought I would. I have missed people as much as I have almost forgotten people that I never thought I would miss/forget. Well, I have always had a strong philosophy about missing someone, and it has kept me from doing just that in many situations and with many people, but this philosophy seems to have disappeared somewhere along the way which I actually don't like at all. I don't like being that dependent, when I know that I can take care of myself. I should be fully able to just "erase" someone from my mind just by wanting it, as I could do before. So, once and for all, I will try to make this happen. Once and for all is all I'm asking for. Just let me forget, because I don't want to think nor miss anymore.
Of course, this does not concern everyone. I don't mind missing family, good friends or my NZ whanau, because all of you are close to my heart and will always be, and missing you only brings me to good memories and a smile on my face. Even though I can't see you right now, I'm still grateful for every second with you. I don't mind missing you just because of that, because you make me smile.
HOWEVER
By the time my smile fades away because I miss someone, that's when my mind needs to be cleared. So, why isn't it working as it should?
Just some 7 am thoughts. I'm tired and still a bit "high" on coffee and JD & coke. Excuses for any confusions. I'm just done with this now. Time for mind dicipline.
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